Today at work I sat down on one of the specially procured ergonomically designed chairs in the open plan area, carefully thought through to optimise staff well being, and then smashed my knee into a large jutting out bit of wood under the desk.
'Jesus that hurt' I said, and cursed the idiots who designed this set up, and then immediately forgot about it, as I have done the umpteen times this has happened before.
Except now I'm on a diet. And so the situation has changed...
Yep, the bed bug mania is also back. They've penetrated deep into Iulia's psyche, like she's been home invaded by horny burglars, and so she treats every mark on her body as evidence of another predatory attack. Right now our bed is covered in sticky bug tape that seems to catch everything except bed bugs. I'm constantly finding myself stuck to the side of the bed, as is Loki.
Whatever gives her peace of mind - let it be.
Anyhow, back to the bruises - I only mention them because both Iulia and I have in our minds' eye an end state body shape that we fantasise must be the perfect version of woman and man-hood. For me I guess that's David, albeit with smaller hands. And a bigger, well, you know.
I didn't factor into this vision a truckload of moles, warts, strange old person skin tags, and a panoply of bruises of uncertain provenance. And I've begun to realise that the goal of weight loss alone is insufficient to bring the full menu of happiness.
Don't worry, I'm not going to use this as an excuse to peek into the fridge. Or open the drinks cabinet. Or hoover up Loki's leftover biscuits. Honest.
Just going to the kitchen now to um... tidy up.
Good that the bed bugs are now part of our day to day discussion. Safer to say bugs as Iulia is now obsessed by any bugs, the tape is there to stay
Bruises! Tell me about them. I have the mother of all bruises at the moment. It’s like having my own art gallery….different colour every morning.